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Monday, January 5, 2009

A New Year,Does it Necessarily Mean A New Me?

So,its been like how many months since I updated this blog? Guess been too busy with sleeping in the day,and out at night.Still having sleeping difficulties as usual.Sickening,but hey,thats how I go.

2009 huh.Here,so fast.Seems like yesterday 2008 started,well,not really,but you catch my drift.Guess,looking back,there were a million things I'm not proud of doing.Hurting people here and there.I apologize to those I hurt,and sorry again for any mistake in the future.I'm still only human.There are a million things in my head,thoughts coming in and out like a train.Guess,throughout last year,I learned a lot of things.Whether mentally,emotionally or even physically,there were experiences I had that sucks,that brought happiness.But one thing for sure,last year was where I really saw my true friends.The ones who irritate me,the ones who bug me,the ones who actually care enough to hang out with me till late at night.Guess,one thing I have to say,thanks for being there bro.

Anyways,been thinking lately,so what if its new year? Doesn't mean I have to change for it.But still,as usual me being fickle minded,I guess I did change throughout 2008.Maybe people do notice,maybe they don't.It doesn't matter does it.As long as I feel great bout myself,why should i care right.Maybe all this experiences actually change me to become more optimistic.In one way,theres a change right there.

Honestly,on my mind,I'm still kinda afraid of what the future brings.What if I fail in life? What if I won't make it in school? What if I'll turn into a junkie? What if I won't even survive another day? If its for someone else,yea,it'll be worth it to just leave this Earth,this Planet,this Life.But what if I die because of stupid things? I guess,it doesn't really matter.Whatever is coming will come no matter what,I'll just have to face it one way or another.Right?

Eddy Outs..

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|12:06 AM|

still wondering about my future...


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